Well here it is, the first post of my new life. This is the official beginning of what I am hoping will be my new life. I’ve been at work all day and I’m really glad to be back relaxing and writing. I first want to thank all of you guys who are following the blog, I really can’t do this by myself and if this is going to become what I want it to, I need all the help I can get. I already have a few friends helping out directly and I know that I have everyone’s support. Thanks everyone and now on to the first real blog of my quest to change my life.
Today’s been like every other day except for the fact that I couldn’t stop thinking about writing. I had a pretty long commute so I had a lot of time to think about what I wanted to say. About 4 hours of almost every day is spent either on a bus or train, or waiting for a bus or train. I do this everyday, day in day out, waiting for something to happen that will change. I sit there hoping for someone to see my art, or my site or call me for an interview. I wait for my phone to ring with a number that isn’t in my speed dial, hoping that it’s about a new job. Whenever I get a call from a new number it’s usually about my student loans, or credit card, or telling me that I won a free cruise and all I have to do is sign up for 2 years of Sports Illustrated. To be honest, I haven’t applied to another job since November 5th.
I complain about my job everyday, I come home exhausted, smelly and with feet that hurt so bad I can’t walk inside without shoes and what have I done about it? Absolutely nothing. I’ve become completely complacent with this job because it’s money that I didn’t have and it’s easy as shit to do. I sit in a mall for most of my awake life and try to sell software to a bunch of rude stuck up mall goers. To be honest, I’m pretty good at it and it’s okay money but I’m not doing what I’m supposed to be doing. I hate malls and I spend more time in one than anywhere else.
Today I worked from 10AM to 6PM and I talked to a total of 3 people. I sat on the company message board talking to other kiosk workers that were as bored as I was. I literally sat all day counting down 8 hours of my life until I was able to close up and go out to the bus. I spent the entire day wishing the day was over. Time is passing me by and I can’t do anything about it but click the reload button on Firefox. My life is awake sleeping, I sit in one location letting time pass by while I wait to be allowed to go home and sleep for real. I’m sick of wishing my days away, I’m sick of counting down my life, and I’m sick of sitting on the bus for two hours just to sit at a kiosk for 5, 8, or 11 hours.
These goals are all something that I started and never finished. Since I can remember, I’ve been trying to lose weight. Before I started the last few semesters of school I had been doing the P90X workout and was seeing really good results. Then When the workload got to be too much, I stopped and let myself go. Now I’m heavier than I’ve ever been and I hate that. I’m a little self-conscious about how I look but I’m honestly worried about my health more than my appearance. With diabetes in my family, I should not be eating the way I do. I have some friends that are going to whip me into shape whether I like it or not and I’m starting on a diet. First though I have to finish the unhealthy food I bought or donate it and buy new food.
My next goal is about my artwork. Almost a year ago, I came up with a comic book idea. I spent some time fleshing out characters and stories and I swore that I would work on it after school was over. Needless to say I didn’t do shit with it and I have nothing but what’s in my head and a couple word documents. Before the end of this year, my comic will be made. I am going to begin work on it and post it on my website every time there is a new installment. Also I’m going to completely re do my website. I can’t be Kieran 2.0 without kieranfallon.com Ver 2.0. I’m going to finish the project I’m currently working on with some friends also but on top of that, I am going to also develop a web series of cartoons I had been writing. Again something I thought up and never brought to life. I have other goals but until I achieve them, they’re a secret.
Thanks all of you for following this and please keep reading and feel free to comment. I want to know what you all think. I may write again tonight but if not I’ll be back tomorrow for day 2. Good night.
-Kieran
2 comments:
Hey K. It's Leah. I just wanted to let you know that I support you and hope that you feel as though you are encouraged. I like your goals and have some of my own. May we both get our dreams rolling in this coming year and may it have more happy moments than complacent ones. :)
Happy New Year and I look forward to following your blog.
You can check mine out at
hooahformycaptain.blogspot.com
Miss the old times but look forward to more great ones in the future.
Hey Kieran.
It's good to see that you're trying to transmit what's in your brain into something tangable. I do honestly believe that those things are the hardest, especially with the creative process. Regardless of what I thought I was going to school for 3 years ago, I was a writer. I loved conjuring ideas and they never seemed to materialize. RIght now, I'm on the path to getting this done and making what my future could be into a reality. I see you doing the same thing. The discipline in the attitude will start to give you an unseen motivation. I suppose that's the "it" factor people always talk about when they speak on the topic of success. It has taken me a long time, but I have learned to believe that what I have to offer, is fucking badassery. I have to try. If I don't, what would be the point?
I look forward to see what is summoned from the conundrums of your mind Kieran. You've got a lot to offer on many different levels. Keep the confidence going and the energy positive.
Your goals are all capable of your reach! Keep it up Kieran!
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